Let me start by saying this blog comes from a place of disappointment. Disappointment in myself. 2021 and 2020 actually we’re pivotal years in my life, well the entire world’s lives !! So many changes, so many thoughts, so many feelings remained bottled up. And why didn’t I get them out? Who knows? Not taking the time? Maybe writing in a journal although it’s not much there either. Or just at a point where there is so much oversharing, I was afraid to be lumped in a group of people who talked too much. Or could it be I was afraid of the opinions of others? I am sure it was a concoction of all of these things. Overthinking and keeping things bottled in is something I suffer greatly from. It has made it to where sometimes I think too much and when it’s time to use my brain it’s all thought out! I’ll give myself a tad bit of grace but not too much to rest on or I will do the same thing in 2022. I have to remember why I created this blog years ago. To get the things out of my head. People today call it a brain dump. That’s cool but I don’t want to think of what comes out of my brain as body waste, and that’s kind of what I think of when I see that phrase. I’d like to think of it more as a space to “clear the clutter”. Clearing physical clutter is helpful so I am sure clearing one’s mind of all the accumulation of the day, week or month could prove to be just as helpful. Here’s to “clearing the clutter”. You should try it too!
I haven’t published a blog since October last year. I just noticed that it was around the time when my granddaddy got really sick and things started going downhill after he had hip surgery. So many lives have been lost since then in this country and personally in my family. My family entered into a season of death like I have never seen before. As a matter of fact I am going to a funeral this Saturday. I came across the below post I wanted to post to my church group after one of my clients committed suicide. I think I did. I don’t remember.Something told me to go ahead and make it public. Remember this is from May 2016 and a lot of things happened to me personally after that. Maybe I will share one day.
Please read below. It’s unedited.
One of my clients committed suicide. It was sad to hear and sadder to even think what could have been so bad so troubling that you no longer wanted to live. It bothers me that the client had no hope. I can’t judge because I too have felt hopeless. Like that could possibly be the only way out. But prayer works. Not just mine but the people who pray for me. Yet in addition to prayer sometimes you just need to get those issues out or maybe get something out of balance in balance. I’ve told people over and over again if you have a tummy ache you got to the doctor to get better. It’s the same with the mind. Everything isn’t a demon. Sometimes you can have a certified sickness or some sort of mental trauma that you need to see someone about. It’s ok, if you need a pill take it. I myself said I would not take medication from a therapist etc, but that’s me and I pray I never have to. You or someone you know may be different.
If you are going thru something I can bet you are not alone. We all have trouble. Talk to someone. No it doesn’t have to be me but if you want I can listen. I won’t judge, I can’t. I may seem to so called have it together but trust me we’ve probably been thru a lot of the same things. I’m just writing this in case someone feels hopeless, I guess like my client did. When I felt hopeless I went to a counselor. At first I did it due to the urging of loved ones, but now I am glad I did. I should have much sooner. I don’t share that a lot because it is a stigma that can come along with having trouble in the mind. People like to label you “crazy” when all you need is a little help or to talk and feel like you aren’t burdening your family and friends. It will seem weird at first, paying someone to listen to you, but I’d rather pay up then to end up…well you know. Yes that may be an extreme case but it is very common. I do believe in the power of prayer, but I do also believe God put people on earth to help us get better whether it is physical or mental. Yes we can go to our leaders, but they may be going thru their own personal battles. Just remember doctors, therapists, counselors and support groups have been put in place for a reason.