The Other Woman

I was the one there when you cried at night and you could not explain what was wrong
Yet you love someone else now like they never did anything wrong
And don’t get me wrong I am happy for you, but it still hurts because of how much I love you.

And you too  in and out of my life in what felt like an instant.
I don’t even know if you are okay and you don’t care to tell me
I was just a pit stop in your journey
But I know you were happy when you were with me

I always thought of the day that you would leave me because I knew you would.
They never stay.
I invest all this time. The headaches the mental anguish. But I knew what I was signing up for. You made me feel like I was special that I meant something to you. The look in your eyes in the morning made me feel like we were the only two people in the world that mattered. But in time you will forget all about me. You will wake up to another. All the love, hugs and kisses and time. Oh the time…

As happy as you were when you would see me. As sad as you were when you are not with me. I still felt like just the other woman.

And now you too have left me. Now what am I to do. Do I give my heart, mind and time to another? Or do I just continue to live happily empty and painfully protected.

I decided I couldn’t stand the pain of being just the other woman again. I must carry on with my life and in time my heart will grow stronger. And one day when it’s time I can maybe try to think about letting another in.

I hope she treats you with kindness, patience, compassion and care. I wish I could see you, talk to you or just hold you in my arms again. Just for a moment…

Dedicated to S&S

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Mommy Dearest

I like to think I was a decent child. I didn’t cause too many problems when I was younger. BUT and this is a big BUT, as I aged a bit, I have gotten myself into some situations that may not have made my “mommy dearest” too proud at the time. I hear mothers speak about their children like they are little princes and princesses and can do absolutely no wrong. Don’t get me wrong that is how it should be and right now they probably are sweet little people. On the other hand, I have been told there are a lot of mothers who sometimes put down other little kids because they don’t measure up to their precious ones. Can you believe these people actually exist? I have to admit I know I have said something in the past about a child’s behavior without taking into account factors that are beyond the child’s control. Nowadays, I try to curb my tongue, especially since I am not a mother yet. I had to evaluate myself and come to the conclusion that it is not very wise to put other kids down especially when I had no idea what these children may be dealing with, or how mine will turn out. Now don’t get me wrong I know we are going to give a side eye or two when we see a tantrum going on or offer “something” to “get that kid together”. I’m talking about more serious situations that have a deeper cause than a child being a spoiled brat.

There may be a reason why this preteen is sending pictures to your son of places that should remain covered until she gets into the shower. Do you know she was molested by her older cousin’s friend for years and that is the only way she knows how to get attention? Oh yeah, and we haven’t discussed what your little sweet boy sent in a text to her. Ok, ok before you start yelling at the screen: In no way do I condone this activity or think it should go unpunished, but instead of telling everyone at the PTA meeting maybe you should cover her in prayer. Or at least try to speak to her parents privately about the situation.

The little girl on your daughter’s soccer team jersey looks a little dingy. She’s a happy little girl who wants to play soccer with her friends. Her reality is that her father kicked her mom out 2 weeks ago and cleaned out her bank account. They are now penniless and living with the grandmother who can barely take care of herself. Forget paying to wash clothes they need to eat. Why not wash it in the sink you say? Water’s off this week.

The little 16 year old down the street is fighting again. Before you holler “ghetto girl” you should know that her parents have not been home for three days, again, and someone just tried to take her little sister’s lunch. There is no more food in the house.

You can do the best you can to raise your sweet little girl along with her biological father whom you are married too and living with in your perfect little 3 bedroom house. Be wise mam’, know that she will grow up. I’m not saying she will turn into a tramp but be careful what you speak about other little girls or boys for that matter. the bible says, “train up a child…” and you know the rest. And I believe in that. Although I didn’t “depart from it” I sure took a little break from time to time. Also, be careful of saying what you will and will not tolerate. You never know what you will do until you are put in a situation. My mother was the perfect example of what a woman should be and I have never had “daddy issues” as my father was always in my life. But there are some things; a few people may be able to attest to, that I did that wasn’t so sweet. At times I was not conducting myself like a lady. Shucks sometimes now I can get out of pocket.

Although I do not have children, I do have a soft spot for kids and I know how I was, and how I turned out was only by the grace of God and being blessed with a mother and father who weren’t critical of others. So, the next time you judge, oh yes there will be a next time, be sure to extend the same grace and mercy you would want someone to extend to your child. You never know when you will be on the other side of the bars. you never know when you will have to pick your child up from a “drunken stupor”. You never know when you will have to hold your child’s hand in the clinic. You never know when you will have to save your child from embarrassment or stigma, so in the meantime focus on saving someone else’s.

Deep in the back of the closet everyone has at least one wire hanger.

Matthew 7 (1-3)